Heists

After the recent heists across the world, people keep asking me if I had anything to do with it. The two biggest ones I can name are the cash depot heist in Britain, and the art heist in Rio. I assure you as unlikely as it sounds, it wasn't me. My reputation as an international man of mystery has taken a bigger name than I can admit to. Though I am mysterious, I am not by any means international.

I won't lie; I could have used that $74 million from the cash depot heist, but I haven't ever been to Great Britain. I was also at school at the time of the incident, so my alibi is legitimate.

The famous pieces of art stolen from a museum in Rio during their Carnival festivities also weren’t me. I do enjoy Dali, but not so much Matisse. The rest that were taken seem to be the kind of art arrogant people have just to say they have it, not really to enjoy it. I’m not arrogant.

I hope everyone can sleep better tonight knowing it wasn’t me who pulled these heists. Everyone can stop pointing their fingers at me now. Also, remember that I am indeed mysterious.

Sudoku

Every day I have to do the sudoku in my school paper. Every day. I usually do it between classes, or during a lunch break. The one at school only has three difficulty levels: bronze, silver, and gold. Obviously gold is the hardest and bronze is the easiest.

None of them are too difficult, as I have been able to complete them all, every time. Not once has an Emerald sudoku stumped me. On the other hand, the one in the Register Guard has a seven difficulty levels. Seven! I've managed to complete up to six stars almost every time. Unfortunately the seven star difficulty I have yet to solve. I also do one on shockwave.com. One is not enough when it comes to sudoku. More than one can be enough.

That reminds me of something I heard today at school, "What is a physicist's definition of a diatomic molecule? One atom too many!"

Stupid, Smelly, Hippies

They're just gross. They stink like the bowels of a hog who hasn't had anything but corned beef to eat (they wouldn't if they didn't wear petruli), they only work as hard as their trust fund won't make them, and they often wear stupid hats. I hate those stupid hats.

If you read my earlier post about a stinking dirty hippy, you'll see why I dislike them on a personal level. They also use marijuana, the drug. If you need to break the law to get a buzz, you have some serious problems. That weed money should be saved up to buy a shrink.

Hippies also hug trees. Honestly! Hugging a tree? These people are idiots, and unfortunately hippy isn't a selected against trait, because they reproduce. Too much. I can smell them just writing this.

Another thing that I dislike about hippies is their inability to keep their clothes on in public. Would it kill them to not have a naked parade every year? Have they no shame?

On a serious note, not all hippies are bad, look at Matt Groening, he's a good guy.

Women's Snowboarding Super pipe

I've been pretty addicted to the Olympics this past week, watching it almost non-stop while its on, and thinking about it while its not. I watched the women's snowboarding the other night, and though I didn't completely agree with the judges on the order of the medal winners, I was pleased with their performances. I was almost convinced that the US would make a sweep, but then Norway stepped in with a great run and kept Clark from getting another medal. Had I been the judge, Norway would have made second, Teter third, and Bleiler would have won the gold. This was just the order I would have chosen by watching them ride. After seeing the interviews, I wish Teter wouldn't have won a medal at all. She definitely didn't need the air time to sound like an idiot stoner. Bleiler on the other hand was very articulate, and knew the english language very well. She also didn't wear a stupid hat.

Another one!

Official Survivor Congratulations! You scored 77%!

Whether through ferocity or quickness, you made it out. You made the right choice most of the time, but you probably screwed up somewhere. Nobody's perfect, at least you're alive.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 37% on survivalpoints

Link: The Zombie Scenario Survivor Test written by ci8db4uok on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

More stupid tests

The Slow Dancer Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer (DGLDm) Steady, reliable, and cradling her tenderly. Take a deep breath, and let it out real easy...you are The Slow Dancer. Your focus is love, not sex, and for your age, you have average experience. But you're a great, thoughtful guy, and your love life improves every year. There's also a powerful elimination process working in your favor: most Playboy types get stuck raising unwanted kids before you even begin settling down. The women left over will be hot and yours. Your ideal woman is someone intimate, intelligent, and very supportive. Your exact opposite: The Hornivore Random Brutal Sex Master While you're not exactly the life of the party, you do thrive in small groups of smart people. Your circle of friends is extra tight and it's HIGHLY likely they're just like you. You appreciate symmetry in relationships. ALWAYS AVOID: The Battleaxe CONSIDER: The Maid of Honor or The Sonnet Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating. My profile name: Wagadoo1

Withdrawl

Shortly after denouncing Blogs as a reliable form of information, my good buddy tells me to go to his blog. How foolish I felt. I went to it, was entertained, then proceded to make additions to my blog. After these events, I hereby withdraw the statement I made about the lameness of blogs. Once again my interests have been caught, and probably more posts will be made. I really doubt anyone is reading this, but if you are I apologise for the inconvenience.

Stinking Flynn

You are a Social Moderate (50% permissive) and an... Economic Conservative (63% permissive) You are best described as a: Centrist Link: The Politics Test on OkCupid Free Online Dating Also: The OkCupid Dating Persona Test

Nerdity